Attention! If the conversation involves some difficult events and you see that the child is in a serious psychological condition, despite all your efforts to help, seek assistance from psychologists or psychotherapists who specialize in trauma.

Scenario: The Key - Great Fear

The Great Fear - an interactive story about the past when something unfortunate happened.
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Creating a therapeutic story about a traumatic event is an important step in addressing a child’s emotional and psychological issues. It helps the child find a way to express their feelings, develop new strategies, and begin the process of positive change in their life.

If the situation involves complex events and you see that the child is in a difficult psychological state despite your efforts, seek help from psychologists or psychotherapists who specialize in trauma.

Why is this needed?

  • Uncover Difficult Moments from the Past: Help the child understand and share painful memories.
  • Learn to Talk about Difficulties: Teach how to talk about challenging events that occurred in the past.
  • Build Strong Relationships: Create an atmosphere of trust and understanding between parents and the child.
  • Solve Problems Together: Support the child in finding solutions to various difficulties.
  • Form a Sense of Self and the World: Help the child better understand how the world works and their role in it.

When This is Needed?

  • The child is troubled by something;
  • The child’s behavior has changed;
  • The child witnessed a conflict;
  • The child has experienced a traumatic event, grief (violence, illness, life-threatening situations, death of someone).

Examples of Story Topics:

  1. Stuck in an elevator;
  2. Hospital stay;
  3. Parents’ divorce;
  4. Divorce with violence;
  5. Accident (car crash) with injury (broken leg, arm);
  6. Accident at a playground;
  7. Living in a conflict-ridden atmosphere;
  8. Self-aggressive behavior;
  9. Insecurity and fear after boundary violations;
  10. Moving to a new place;
  11. Loss of friends;
  12. Violence;
  13. Foreign language;
  14. The child does not get what they need in new circumstances;
  15. Cruel behavior by another child;
  16. Being embarrassed in front of family, friends, or strangers;
  17. The child is forced to leave their parental home and reacts with aggression.

How to Do It:

Step I. Ask the child:

  1. When you remember an old unpleasant event, what picture comes to your mind?
  2. When you think about the scariest moment of the event, what do you think about yourself?

Attention! If the child does not want to answer the questions, do not force them. Start creating the story yourself.

Phrases Not to Say to a Child During the Conversation:

  • “It wasn’t that bad”;
  • “I never left you”;
  • “It didn’t hurt”;
  • “There’s no need to be afraid”;
  • “You can’t think like that, it’s nonsense”;
  • “Why were you so inattentive?”;
  • “What are you making up? What did you imagine?”;
  • “Pull yourself together”;
  • “No need to cry”;
  • “But you didn’t upset me”;
  • “You really disappointed me”.

The child has the right to a subjective perception of the situation.

Step II. The Beginning of the Story.

Once upon a time, there was…
His name was…
He did everything that everyone else did:
first, he…
then…,
and then…
and then…

  • Start with a positive situation “Everything was fine…” to create a sense of security for the child.
  • Choose the main character: Should it be a fictional or real character?
  • Identification. The main character should have similar traits to the child, but to allow the child to distance themselves from the character, the name should be different.
  • Discuss and visualize in detail: What does the character see, hear, feel? What smells does he notice, what tastes (favorite treats), bodily sensations (what does he feel in his stomach, in his head…)?
  • If the situation is too overwhelming, the story can be told in several versions with different emotional intensities: initially, the character could be something like a sunflower; after a few days, the same story can be told, bringing the character closer, choosing a person as the protagonist.

Step III. Something Happens

The overwhelming situation

  • the worst image,
  • the hardest episode,
  • a burdening thought
    (“I…”);
    a description of the unpleasant feeling
    (“Unfortunately, this can happen to a child/animal…”)

Once upon a time…
Suddenly…

Step IV. What Does the Hero Do

And so…

Ask the child:

What thought came to your mind?

Step V. Something Goes Wrong

However…

Step VI. Then…

Our hero tries to solve the problem.
(Actively doing something, becoming stronger every day, asking someone for help…)

  • ways to solve it,
  • an exit,
  • active child participation,
  • a positive feeling,
  • a good thought that helps reduce the burden
    (“I…”)

Here are some examples of main characters for creating therapeutic stories:

Realistic Characters
  1. Petryk, a brave boy

    • Appearance: dark hair, big green eyes, dimples on his cheeks.
    • Personality: curious, loves adventures, always helps friends.
  2. Marta, a kind girl

    • Appearance: blonde hair, blue eyes, always wears a red ribbon in her hair.
    • Personality: empathetic, loves reading books, always ready to listen to others.
  3. Maksymko, a little dreamer

    • Appearance: red-haired, curly, wears glasses.
    • Personality: imagines himself as a superhero, loves drawing, a bit shy.
  4. Olenka, a little explorer

    • Appearance: short chestnut hair, always wears colorful socks.
    • Personality: loves nature, explores everything around her, asks many questions.
  5. Arsen, a young inventor

    • Appearance: dark hair, always in a blue baseball cap.
    • Personality: interested in technology, builds models, loves experimenting.
  6. Sofiyka, a little dancer

    • Appearance: long hair tied in a ponytail, wears a ballet tutu.
    • Personality: loves dancing, cheerful, always in motion.
  7. Ivanko, a cheerful boy

    • Appearance: light brown hair, a bright smile.
    • Personality: loves laughing, telling jokes, playing football.
  8. Katrya, a little artist

    • Appearance: short hair with colorful clips.
    • Personality: loves drawing, dreamy, very creative.
  9. Andriyko, a little musician

    • Appearance: blonde hair, always with a small guitar.
    • Personality: loves playing instruments, singing, has a good sense of rhythm.
  10. Mykolka, a little traveler

    • Appearance: dark hair, always with a backpack.
    • Personality: loves traveling, telling stories about his adventures.

These characters can be used to create therapeutic stories where they face various difficulties, experience emotions similar to those the child feels, and learn to overcome them.

Fantasy Characters

Here are some examples of fantasy characters for creating therapeutic stories:

  1. Forest Gnome Green

    • Appearance: small, with a beard, wears a green cap.
    • Personality: wise, friendly, knows many forest secrets.
  2. Fairy Lily

    • Appearance: tiny with wings, wears a flower dress.
    • Personality: kind, always ready to help, has magical healing dust.
  3. Little Dragon Toby

    • Appearance: small dragon, bright green, with wings.
    • Personality: curious, a bit shy but very brave.
  4. Elf Ariel

    • Appearance: tall, with pointed ears, dressed in elvish clothes.
    • Personality: cheerful, quick, loves singing songs.
  5. Mavka Marichka

    • Appearance: a girl with long hair, covered in flowers and leaves.
    • Personality: protects nature, wise, loves dancing.
  6. Wizard Alfred

    • Appearance: an old man with a long beard, wears a robe and a hat.
    • Personality: wise, calm, always knows how to solve a problem.
  7. Water Spirit Droplet

    • Appearance: small water spirit, looks like a drop of water.
    • Personality: playful, loves splashing and playing in water.
  8. Warrior Cat Murczyk

    • Appearance: large cat with a sword and helmet.
    • Personality: brave, protector of the weak, always ready for battle.
  9. Witch Greta on a Broom

    • Appearance: small witch with a pointed hat, wears a black dress.
    • Personality: a bit clumsy, but very kind and wants to help others.
  10. Flying Pony Peggy

    • Appearance: small pony with wings, shiny.
    • Personality: cheerful, loves adventures, helps anyone in need.
  11. Giant Bob

    • Appearance: large, with kind eyes, wears simple clothes.
    • Personality: a bit clumsy but very kind and protects his friends.
  12. Little Troll Trixie

    • Appearance: small, with green skin, a funny nose.
    • Personality: mischievous, loves jokes, always seeks adventure.
  13. Princess Dawn

    • Appearance: beautiful girl with golden hair, wears a crown.
    • Personality: just, wise, always ready to help her kingdom.
  14. Gnome Blacksmith Nikita

    • Appearance: short, strong, with a beard and hammer.
    • Personality: hardworking, a bit grumpy, but with a big heart.
  15. Magical Unicorn Star

    • Appearance: white unicorn with a sparkling horn.
    • Personality: gentle, kind, has magical abilities that help heal.

These fantasy characters will help the child immerse themselves in a magical world and find ways to overcome their fears and problems.

Important!
  1. Maintain accuracy in details: Indicate who did what, when, and where.
  2. Let the child describe the situation while drawing: Encourage them to talk about the smells, tastes, sensations, and thoughts associated with the situation.
  3. Explain to the child that physical reactions such as freezing, screaming, crying, or running away, as well as emotions like fear, aggression, or confusion, are natural in difficult situations. The body reacts this way to protect the hero.

Step VII. The End of the Story

In the end… (everything is resolved, or maybe not, but the hero has become stronger and gained experience).
New positive state. Strengthening the sense of safety and good mood.

Here are a few phrases you can say to the child at the end of the therapeutic story they created themselves:

  1. “You told your story wonderfully. It’s very important.”
  2. “I am very proud of you for being able to share your thoughts and feelings.”
  3. “This story shows your courage and strength.”
  4. “You are very wise to have figured out how to overcome this situation.”
  5. “You found your own way out of this story.”
  6. “Your story is very interesting and has an important lesson for us.”
  7. “You showed how important it is to openly talk about your feelings.”
  8. “This story helps us all better understand what is important to you.”
  9. “I am impressed with how well you can express your thoughts.”
  10. “You did a great job putting your feelings into this story.”

These phrases will support the child after they share their experience and allow them to feel supported and understood.

Scenario for a Therapeutic Story:

Petryk and the Magic Elevator (for children up to 8 years old)

Step I. Establishing Contact

Ask the child:

  • “When you think about an unpleasant event from the past, what image comes to mind?”
  • “When you remember the worst moment of that event, what do you think about yourself?”

Attention! If the child does not want to answer questions, do not force them. Start by creating the story yourself.

Phrases that should not be said to a child during a conversation:

  • “There’s no need to be afraid”
  • “You can’t think like that; it’s nonsense”
  • “What are you making up? What’s gotten into your head?”
  • “Get a grip”
  • “Don’t cry”
  • “But you’ve upset me”
  • “You’ve really disappointed me”

Principle: The child has the right to their subjective perception of the situation.


Step II. The Beginning of the Story

Once upon a time, there was a boy named Petryk. He did everything just like every other day: first, he woke up, then he had breakfast, and then he went to school/daycare. Everything was fine, and Petryk felt safe.

Elements:

  • Start with a positive situation to create a sense of security for the child.
  • Choose a main character: in this case, a real boy named Petryk.
  • Identification: The main character has similar traits to the child, but with a different name for the freedom of distancing.
  • Discuss and illustrate in detail: what the hero sees, hears, feels; what smells he senses, tastes (what are his favorite treats), bodily sensations (what he feels in his stomach, head, etc.).

Step III. The Challenging Situation

One day, Petryk went with his mother to visit his grandmother, who lived on the tenth floor of a tall building. Everything was fine until they approached the elevator. Suddenly, Petryk felt a strong fear and did not want to get into the elevator. He remembered a previous unpleasant incident when he got stuck in an elevator for a few minutes.

Step IV. What the Hero Does

So, Petryk decided not to take the elevator and told his mother. Seeing his fear, she decided to help. They sat on a bench near the entrance, and his mother started telling a story about a magical elevator.

Ask the child: “What thought came to your mind?”

Step V. Something Goes Wrong

However, Petryk still felt fear even after his mother’s story. He thought he would never be able to overcome his fear.

Step VI. Solving the Problem

Then Petryk decided to imagine that the elevator was a magical transport taking him to a fantastic world. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and imagined flying to a magical world where kind fairies and brave knights lived. Petryk felt stronger and braver. He dared to get into the elevator with his mother.

The elevator smoothly ascended, and when the doors opened on the tenth floor, Petryk stepped out with a smile alongside his mother. He had overcome his fear and felt like a real hero.

Ask the child: “How do you think Petryk felt at that moment?”

Step VII. Positive Conclusion

Since then, Petryk always used the elevator, imagining new adventures in the magical world. He was no longer afraid; on the contrary, he looked forward to new exciting journeys with the magical elevator.

Conclusion:

Our hero learned to overcome his fear by actively engaging and imagining positive moments. This helped him feel stronger and more confident in himself.

Creating therapeutic stories by a child about a traumatic event is an important tool in working with emotional and psychological trauma.

Here are some aspects to consider:

  1. Support and Safety:
    It’s important to create a safe and supportive environment for the child. The therapist or adult must ensure that the child feels their feelings and emotions are important and will be respected.

  2. Choosing Story Elements:
    The child can choose story elements, such as the main character, the setting, the sequence of events, etc. This helps the child feel in control and promotes their active participation in the therapy process.

  3. Expressing Feelings:
    It’s important to encourage the child to express their feelings, emotions, and thoughts through the story. This allows them to feel support and understanding of their experiences.

  4. Adapting the Story:
    The story can be adapted depending on the child’s age and developmental level. For example, younger children may use more visual elements or fairy tale characters, while older children may prefer a more direct approach to the situation.

  5. Developing New Skills:
    The story can include elements that promote the development of new strategies or emotional management skills. For example, the hero might demonstrate how they seek support, restore self-belief, or develop strategies for overcoming fear or anxiety.

  6. Gradual Introduction of Information:
    It’s important to avoid overwhelming the child with potentially traumatic information. The therapist should guide the process so that the child gradually expresses and understands their feelings without being overwhelmed.

8 September 2024